Chapter 5: The Box That Wasn't There Yesterday
Marcus stood at the foot of the attic ladder, staring into the narrow opening above him.
Vanessa remained several feet behind him.
Neither spoke.
The attic was not completely dark. A small ceiling fixture illuminated the first few feet of insulation and exposed wooden beams. Beyond that, the space stretched into shadowless, dusty distance beneath the roof.
Marcus reached for the pull cord of the attic light.
Nothing happened.
He tried the switch again.
Still nothing.
Behind him, Vanessa cleared her throat.
“The bulb is probably burned out.””
Marcus didn't turn around.
“Probably.””
“I'll get you a flashlight.””
“I have one in the garage.””
He climbed the ladder.
The wood creaked beneath his weight, and the smell of cardboard and old insulation rose around him. At the top, he pulled himself onto the attic floor and crouched beneath a low beam.
He had not been up there in months.
After Danielle died, he had packed most of her belongings into labeled boxes, intending to sort them when he was ready. Vanessa had offered to help, but Marcus had insisted on doing it himself.
He remembered putting the boxes near the far wall.
Now several stood open.
Marcus froze.
He knew he had closed them.
Every one.
He moved toward the nearest box and knelt beside it. A strip of tape dangled from the cardboard edge. Inside lay folded sweaters, a scarf, and a pair of Danielle's old running shoes.
Nothing appeared missing at first glance.
But the next box had been emptied almost completely.
Marcus touched the torn tape.
“When did you come up here?”” he called down.
Vanessa's voice came from the hallway.
“I told you. I've been busy.””
“That wasn't my question.””
“I don't remember!””
Marcus examined the open box more closely. The cardboard had been crushed along one side, and several pieces of packing paper lay scattered across the floor.
He reached for a flashlight he had stored near the attic entrance.
As its beam swept across the space, something caught his attention.
A small cardboard box sat behind a stack of holiday decorations.
It was unfamiliar.
Every other container had his handwriting on it, labels such as Danielle—Winter Clothes, Noah—Baby Years, and Family Photographs.
This one had no label.
Its lid was held shut with a strip of blue painter's tape.
Marcus pulled it forward.
The cardboard scraped against the wooden floor.
“Marcus?”” Vanessa called.
“What are you doing?””
He stared at the box.
“Finding out what you didn't want me to see.””
“Don't open that.””
His hands stopped.
Slowly, he looked toward the attic entrance.
Vanessa stood on the top rung of the ladder, one hand gripping the wooden rail. Her face was pale, and her eyes were fixed on the box.
Marcus looked down at it again.
“What's inside?””
“Nothing important.””
“Then you won't mind if I look.””
She climbed another rung.
“Marcus, please. Leave it alone.””
He tore the tape.
Inside were several envelopes, a folded sheet of paper, and a small bundle wrapped in an old cotton cloth.
Marcus removed the paper first.
It was a printed inventory sheet with a date from shortly after Danielle's death. Several items were listed in neat columns: jewelry, photographs, personal correspondence, and miscellaneous keepsakes.
Some entries had check marks beside them.
Others had been crossed out.
Near the bottom, one handwritten note stood out.
Silver heart bracelet—retain separately.
Marcus read the line twice.
The handwriting wasn't his.
He recognized Vanessa's instead.
He looked at her.
“You wrote this?””
Vanessa shook her head too quickly.
“I don't remember.””
“You don't remember writing your own handwriting?””
“Marcus, I was helping you organize things. I could have written anything.””
“Why was Danielle's bracelet listed separately?””
“I don't know.””
He held up the paper.
“Then explain this.””
Vanessa climbed onto the attic floor.
She approached him carefully, her hands raised in a placating gesture.
“Listen to me. When someone dies, there are always things that get misplaced. I might have found the bracelet in one of the boxes and put it aside so it wouldn't get damaged.””
“Then why didn't you tell me?””
“Because you were already falling apart!””
Marcus recoiled.
Vanessa continued, her words coming faster.
“You couldn't open her closet without crying. You barely slept. Every time Noah asked for something that belonged to her, you looked as if the world was ending. I was trying to keep this family functioning.””
Marcus stared at her.
“You think I was too emotional to be trusted with my own wife's belongings?””
“I think you weren't thinking clearly!””
“So you decided what I was allowed to know?””
“I was trying to protect you!””
“From what?””
Vanessa's mouth opened.
Then closed.
Marcus held up the inventory sheet again.
“From a bracelet? From a box? From something you apparently knew about before I did?””
“You're twisting everything!””
“Then untwist it.””
He placed the paper on the floor and lifted the cotton bundle.
Inside lay a handful of ordinary objects: a wooden hairbrush, two faded photographs, a cracked ceramic ornament, and a folded birthday card addressed to Noah.
Marcus recognized the card immediately.
Danielle had bought it for Noah's seventh birthday, but she had died before she could give it to him.
Marcus had searched for it after the funeral.
He had assumed it was somewhere in the house.
His fingers trembled as he unfolded the card.
On the front was a cartoon astronaut floating among stars. Inside, Danielle had written a short message in blue ink.
My sweet Noah, keep being brave. Keep asking questions. And always remember that you are loved more than you can imagine.
Marcus sat back on his heels.
For a moment, the attic disappeared.
He could see Danielle at the kitchen table, carefully writing cards while Noah colored beside her. He could hear her laugh when their son insisted on drawing a rocket ship with twelve engines.
Marcus pressed the card against his palm.
“Why was this in here?”” he asked.
Vanessa's voice softened.
“I didn't know you were looking for it.””
“I told you I was.””
“I must have forgotten.””
He stared at her.
“You forgot the birthday card his dead mother wrote for him, but you remembered to hide her bracelet?””
Vanessa's expression hardened.
“I didn't hide anything!””
“Then why was it underneath your jewelry?””
“I already told you!””
“No. You gave me excuses.””
Marcus stood, taking the card and inventory sheet with him.
He looked around the attic again.
More boxes were open now that he knew where to look. Several labels had been peeled away. A stack of family photographs lay face down near a plastic storage bin.
He knelt and picked them up.
The first photograph showed Danielle holding a newborn Noah in a hospital bed.
The second showed the three of them at a beach, Marcus laughing while Danielle tried to stop Noah from eating sand.
The third photograph was missing from its frame.
Only a rectangular piece of backing paper remained.
Marcus stared at the empty space.
He remembered that frame.
It had stood on Danielle's bedside table for years. The photograph showed her with another woman, both smiling at a birthday celebration.
He had never asked much about the other woman because Danielle had told him they had lost touch.
Now the frame was empty.
“Where's the photograph?”” he asked.
Vanessa followed his gaze.
“I don't know.””
Marcus slowly turned toward her.
“You keep saying that.””
“Because I don't know what you're talking about!””
He held up the empty frame.
“This was in Danielle's bedroom.””
“Then maybe it got damaged.””
“Where's the picture?””
“I said I don't know!””
Her voice rose so sharply that a small cloud of dust shook loose from a nearby beam.
Marcus looked at her, then at the bundle in his hands.
He had come into the attic expecting to find an explanation for the bracelet.
Instead, he had found evidence that someone had been moving through his late wife's belongings, separating certain items from the rest.
And Vanessa had known enough to write down what should be retained.
Marcus put the papers into his pocket.
“We're not finished.””
Vanessa stepped toward him.
“Marcus, listen to me. You need to think about Noah. Do you want him growing up in a house where his father suspects everyone?””
Marcus looked directly at her.
“I want him growing up in a house where he doesn't have to be afraid of the adults in it.””
She stared at him.
For the first time, she seemed unable to find a reply.
Marcus descended the ladder and placed Danielle's birthday card on the hallway table. He intended to give it to Noah in the morning, when he could explain that his mother had left him one more message.
But as he reached the bottom, he noticed a small white envelope lying on the floor beneath the attic opening.
It had not been there when he first opened the closet.
Marcus bent to pick it up.
His name was written across the front in Danielle's unmistakable handwriting.
Marcus—please read this when you're alone.
He turned the envelope over.
The seal had already been broken.
Behind him, Vanessa stopped breathing.
Marcus slowly looked at her.
“You've read this.””
Vanessa backed away.
“Marcus—”
“You've read this letter.””
She shook her head, tears suddenly gathering in her eyes.
“I can explain.””
He opened the envelope.
Inside was a single sheet of paper.
The first line was enough to make his knees weaken.
If anything happens to me, please don't let Vanessa decide what Noah deserves to know.
Marcus read it again.
May you like
Then he looked at his wife.
And for the first time, he wondered whether Danielle had known something about Vanessa long before he had.